8 Funny Court Transcripts

Q. What is your brother-in-law's name?
A. Bradford.
Q. What's his first name?
A. I can't remember.
Q. He's been your brother-in-law for years, and you can't remember his first name?
A. No. I tell you I'm too excited. (Rising from the witness chair and pointing to Mr. Bradford.) Nathan, for God's sake, tell them your first name!

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Q. Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York?
A. I refuse to answer that question.
Q. Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago?
A. I refuse to answer that question.
Q. Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami?
A. No.

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Q. Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
A. By death.
Q. And by whose death was it terminated?

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Q. Ms. Hylan, were you cited in the accident?
A. Yes Sir, I was so 'cited I peed all over myself!!

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Q. Are you married?
A. No, I'm divorced.
Q. And what did your husband do before you divorced him?
A. A lot of things I didn't know about.

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Q. Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A. All my autopsies have been performed on dead people.

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